Sometimes you can't make it on your own..

Tough, you think you've got the stuff
You're telling me and anyone
You're hard enough

You don't have to put up a fight
You don't have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to go it alone

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

We fight all the time
You and I... that's alright
We're the same soul
I don't need... I don't need to hear you say
That if we weren't so alike
You'd like me a whole lot more

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to go it alone

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

I know that we don't talk
I'm sick of it all
Can you hear me when I Sing,
you're the reason I sing
You're the reason why the opera is in me

Where are we now?
I've got to let you know
A house still doesn't make a home
Don't leave me here alone

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you that makes it hard to let go
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
Sometimes you can't make it
The best you can do is to fake it
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

):

I'm so drained, it's the last week of the holidays and yet again I let myself drown in my own insanity. I had enough of crying.. I had enough of myself.. I had enough of everything. I'm literally sick and tired. Lost my voice, and lost my mind. It's really hard. What you THINK you can really do, is really different from what you CAN do. When the impact hits you hard right in the head and your heart, it hurts so bad... You just don't know what to do.. I don't. Sometimes I think so hard till I literally break all my thoughts to the ground. I break down. "Is it worth it Jolene?" they asked me.. Hurt is inevitable.. If you can't take it, then don't. Why turn your back on me.. You think leaving me to hang here is easy? Fuck, I've been hanging on to so many ropes I just don't even understand why I even bother to when I could just fucking let go. It's not easy not easy NOT EASY.. ): You never understand. What I've told you eventually fell on deaf ears.. Honestly I can tell you, I can never make it on my own..... )': I'm sorry. I'm sorry to the people.. I really am.. Sorry, I'm sorry...

On a lighter note, I still want to thank the programme committee for the countless efforts put in to make this orientationa a bloody freaking success! I'm really sorry I had been bumming around and so oblivious to my surroundings, without you guys, Business wouldn't have won for the 4th time (: So cheerios to all! 4x CHAMPION, 4 TROPHIES :) So proud of my school. Yipey.

Okay, I need to turn in 'cause I'm running a fever again, and the flu, sore throat, cough seriously is the killer for me. Imagine cheering when you have that kind of nasty throat. ZZZ. So I'm voiceless, don't bother talking to me. Good night. Great Poly Garage Sales later, see ya guys :)

说爱我好不好
就当作是乞讨
哪怕说出口只需要一秒
你都不要..

stay close, don't go.

It's a damn cold night mannnn. Gosh I'm freezing. I'm alr prepared to hit the sack now.. What a gd weather to sleeep in! But thanks school, I've got a pathetic 2hr lecture later. RRARRr. It's okay, I'm gng to acc mummy dear later! I wna treat her for lunch or dinner(: Anyway, THANK GOD FOR THE SUN TODAY! HALLELUJAH! I've got a pretty even mild tan, but I love it. And roseeeey pink cheeks (slightly burnt though)! Thanks twinlove and jacq! Today was reallly fun. You guys tire me outtttt to the maxxxx. Cui-ed. I'm even too tired to upload the pictures now. Maybe tomorrow. Band drained every drop of energy off me. Can't imagine how hungry I was awhile ago. Should have eaten pineapple fried rice! Lol. Random... Anyway.. I think milk taste better before bedtime(: Hmmm. More outings and beaching and junking with you two on days when got-school-like-no-school days! Hate every 9AM mornings. GOD DAMN THE BUS 27, 23, and 15. I'm beaaaatttt. Nights(:

A sweet song(:

Jimmy Eat World, For Me This Is Heaven
The first star I see, may not be a star.
We can't do a thing but wait.
So lets wait for one more.
And the time, such clumsy time in deciding if it's time.
I'm careful, but not sure how it goes.
You can lose yourself in your courage.
When the time we have now ends.
When the big hand goes round again.
Can you still feel the butterflies?
Can you still hear the last goodnight?
And the mindless comfort grows,
when I'm alone with my great plans.
And this is what she says gets her through it:
"If I don't let myself be happy now then when?"
If not now when?
When the time we have now ends.
When the big hand goes round again.
Can you still feel the butterflies?
Can you still hear the last goodnight?
I close my eyes and believe wherever you are,
you're an angel for me.
When the time we have now ends.
When the big hand goes round again.
Can you still feel the butterflies?
Can you still hear the last goodnight?

Over it.

I. DEPRIVE.
One. Sleep
Two. Friends.
Three. Proper meals.
Four. Entertainment.
Five. Tranquility.

That. I. stone. and. typed. this. way.
I. whined.
I. cried.
I. cracked. under. pressure.
Went. insane.
And. started. laughing. to. myself.

Yup. I was driven to insanity due to the work load. I was so overloaded with projects and assignments. And and and and STRESS AND.. ARHHH. Submitted MR report yesterday.. BUT WE WERE 2HOURS LATE, and we couldn't even submit in peace after it was done 'cause Roche went home. He said to be submitted the next morning personally. Then twin and I went down early this morning to apologise for what had happened. We waited for an hour or so to only find he was on leave. ....... Thanks for making me wake up so early. ARG. SO GOD DAMN FRUSTRATED. I only slept 4 hours. I wanted to make up for my sleep debts and there it goes again. I'm so fucking tired.. like every part of me, mentally, physically and emotionally drained. Everyday I slogged for projects for the sake of my grades, and it wasn't worth my time at all. It wasn't fair. ): I had enough of the conflicts and arguements in this group, the too many different ways of getting work done and all this work load. Everyday I'm an angry girl. Then emotions taken its toll, I start to feel the guilt and just want to break down and cry. Who am I exactly? I don't wna retake any modules please. MR is a whole load of shit, I swear. How can we ever work in peaceeeeee?????? ARG. So what it's over, there's still the consequences to face. Forget it. And no, it still doesn't stop me from thinking about it. I. am. still. thinking. about. it.

I wasted my entire day today doing nothing. Watch twin, josh and hai finish up finance proj, which was so totally unproductive. I pray they finish it on time. Twin promised to finish the report on time. Omg, please dont screw up like ytd and everything would be okay, please please.. I can't afford to fail again. And my Psycho. Omg. Endangering 3 fucking modules. OMFG. SAVE ME.. I don't get why I'm so sleepy during psycho tutorials. I will doze off eventually when Mr Jeff's teaching the theories. And honestly speaking, he's not one bit boring. Trust me.. Even doodling the pages didn't help. I still fall asleep with the pencil still in my hand. It's terrible. I need help. Maybe it's just me. Maybe. Just. Kill. Me. PLEASE? Sigh. But activities today were fun. Especially the relaxing and tensing of muscles session. Hehe, really made me laughed after so long. Went to Henderson with twin to find our suppliers and restocked on the hp keychains that's all. Lol, twin went on date! b: Though it left you confused. ): No worries, there's better ones out there.

Finally met up with OLIVIA to chill and de-stress. After 3 damn long weeks. I missed you lovely. Sigh. Talked non-stop till 10pm. Sigh.. Everyone's leaving me soon in September, and off all time when my Birthday's approaching ): Jayjay's sailing to Perth and other continents for two months, Eerik's going into NS - solitary confinement, two Olivia's FLYING, one to China, another one with frequent flights to Bangkok. And wtf, I'm confined in Spore. Time keep still? NO? ): Ya, I'm still praying for a day when time rewinds. It's okay if tomorrow ended without me knowing. Hmmmm. ): Shit, I just rmbed I had some stuff to do. I procastinated. Think it's 11am in school to open up the store later. Yawns, finally more slp. AND BAND. MY red hot chillies, going to see you guys oh-so-soooon. DINNER. : D Good night.

Read my lips, because I'm so over it.